Performed 1979 (?)
Sung to the tune of Cabaret
Who needs computers, and government grants,
To catch the public's eye?
We don't need fancy TV ads,
We've got a Nobel Prize...
Such a campaign sounds like something from off
Madison Avenue:
"You too can win a Nobel Prize!
Just come to C-M-U !"
In A-M-S, G-S-I-A,
When in an economic stupor,
Simon's theory's really super!
Pitt has its Panthers, Duquesne has its Dukes,
Of this we can tell no lies,
But sports never made the world-wide news
Like Herb and his Nobel Prize.
Of all the gang down at H-and-S-S,
It's Herb we idolize,
But not for writing "Simon Says"
It's for his Nobel Prize.
We only wrote
This song, it's true,
`Cause it's easy rhyming
Lots of words with "Herbert Simon"
Herb would be nobody down there at Pitt,
He would catch no one's eyes,
Just come to CMU my friends,
Right here at CMU my friends,
Only at CMU my friends,
Do we have that Nobel Prize!